Even though Johnny Depp has racked up a whopping total of $300 million off appearing in Pirates of The Caribbean and getting in Jerry Buckeimer's good graces does not mean slathering him up to look llike a cross between Tobacco Joe and Papa Shango Voodoo priest equals a strong character especially if you are only speaking in tongues.
Yes, he keeps on taking big blockbuster roles because they are made available to him and cashing in on big profits. Although he is a very talented actor but could he please start going back to playing more dramatic roles he has done in Donnie Brasco, or even Blow for that matter. Why should people like Mark Whalberg and Denzel Washinghton have all the fun when Johnny Depp is certainly in their league . He has so much more to give in a dramatic or action role that he should stop wasting time with these Tim Burton fantasy-land type projects.
His cartoon like roles have become almost as a tired comedic routine as Adam Sandler's and Will Ferrel's that he is losing is people.
Come on Johnny spread those wings and fly we know you can do a lot better. Stretch yourself out a little bit more. Think less of the payday and concentrate more on stronger roles.
#2 - STOP WITH THE ADAPATING AND START WITH THE RE-IMAGINING (Duhh, we pay you guys an arm and a leg to entertain us)
First off, why would you adapt a 1930's serial and 1950s serial that had little to no wide audience appeal? Even with Mr. Depp leading the way it does not equal success if you don't have a strong enough story to back up your star. In the end what do you get? .............CRAP WITH A STAR!
Honestly Ladies and Gentlemen it isn't the actors, nor the cameraman, director, or anyone in the production studios behind this. It is the Executives. For some reason unknown to me and every other movie fan they think that by acquiring to the rights to each and every old TV or Film show that by sending these stories in for a re-write equals Hollywood Gold.
You saw what happened with Battleship last year taking a nose dive deep into the ocean. . It's time Studio Execustives start looking at their projects and think,THIIIINK before they sign off on the doted line on any new projects coming off the assembly line.
When you are adapting new material please have a little more respect for the source material. Having Tonto poke fun at The Lone Ranger uttering his own lines "Hi, Ho Silver Away" is clearly not following the guidelines of Screenplay Adapatation 101. It's more like a slap to the face to the original writers of the radio and TV serial. The movie completely makes fun of the whole story of the birth of the Lone Ranger that they might as well rewind this whole movie and start the hell over again .
If you look back to The Muppets movie yes they poked fun at the original characters but it stayed true to the original source material by having all the orignial characters go their seperate ways. What happens when a famous band or group has been away for so long ? They get back together again in full swing and cater their performances to a whole new audiences such as the movie The Muppets was able to achieve. The Lone Ranger failed to capitalize on this concept.
#3 . INVEST WISELY. DON'T BLOW YOUR STUDIO PROFITS ON A OLD AND CLICHED COWBOY AND INDIANS TALE.
According to records it cost $375 million to make The Lone Ranger so for them to even break even they would have needed to draw in at least $800 million at the Box Office.
So what's the damage they suffered? A loss in $190 million .
Maybe peanuts to the big Disney Studios but let's be reasonable the $375 million dollar they invested is something you would rather invest in a big hit sequel. This method is guaranteed to generate a big return but not by calling a long shot on an opening project you're thinking of generating a sequel from especially another cliched cops, and robbers tale .
#4 - GIVING AN UN-ESTABLISHED ACTOR THE LEAD ROLE IS RISKY FOR ANY MOVIE STUDIO PICTURE.
Even though Arnie Hammer shined in David Finch's The Social Network and is seen as a rising star that does not mean you bank everything you have in thrusting him into a starring role. Honestly, what he brought to the role was very unsatisfactory. He sissified the role of a fictional cowboy name of great stature among Baby Boomers who was seen as a Robin Hood during the long running serials and TV shows of its time.
This Lone Ranger was sissified and in anyone in their right mind could kick his ass including me. He was weak, not confident, incapable of defending himself nor others and did not posses the necessary traits to be a Hero. It was only at the end when it was too late and everyone was sleeping that he stepped it up and gave a long running gallop in a epic train chase. What do you expect to feed a young star's ability to perform when all you have is a lackluster script to work with.
#5. GONE WITH THE WIND ARE THE DAYS OF EPIC JOHN WAYNE AND EASTWOOD WESTERNS.
Let's face it Westerns are your Dad's obsession not the General public. They may have worked before the days of epic CGI movies but they are not working today.
#6 - IF YOU OPEN UP ON THE SAME DAY AS A CGI MOVIE WITH A WEAK STORY EXPECT TO GET YOUR ASS WHIPPED AT THE BOX OFFICE
Despicable Me 2 opened up to #1 on its first weekend and in five days time racked in a whopping $143.1 million making it the highest ever movie opening up strong during a five day span. Now in comparison The Lone Ranger opened up and screened during those same five days as Despicable Me 2 and only brought in $48.4 million.
What's the lesson to be learned big Hollywood? Dont' try to cater an old cowboy story to a new audience of kids especially if those same kids are flocking to the very same movie you are trying to drive them away from. Kids flock to Animated movies like Bees to Honey Nectar. They rarely lose any money regardless of the story and always outperform most movies because of a huge Summer Kid audience on vacation from school.
You either know your competition and plan ahead for a nice return or push forward and get burned.
#7 - "YAWN...TOO LONG"
Enough said !
No comments:
Post a Comment